Thursday, November 19, 2009

Life is dangerous

Got a scary email today saying microwave food is dangerous – free radicals – cancer of the intestines.
Read yesterday, they’ve finally proved that cell phone usage will end up in cancer of the brain.
Using re-cooked oil will give me cancer of whatever body part is left.

The pollution levels in the city are so high that over half of the population will get asthma or other respiratory illnesses.
The underground water has sewage seeping into it which will cause gastro-enteritis or skin problems – or probably both.

Processed food out of cans causes damage of the nervous system.
Cooked food kills all nutrients, and will leave me with iron and calcium and mineral deficiencies.
Raw food will give me salmonella poisoning.

If I stay home and watch TV –I’ll get obese – and slowly blind.
If I get out and drive in the traffic – it’s road rage and stress syndromes.
Walking in the sun causes skin cancer.
Jogging gives me heel and knee tendonitis.

I think the general prediction here is no matter what I do –
if I carry on living, I’m going to die.

So let’s go sit out in the cancerous sunshine, inhale some lung-polluting air, open the bag of carcinogenic chips and wash it down with some liver-damaging vodka.

Who wants to join me ?


  1. Very funny again - something that is wrong with life - and you've made it sound good.

  2. Janedy, your Fever post got 24 comments. You know why? Because you mailed and told us that you had posted it. Hint Hint. Get more active, and less lazy, Baby ! And as Neeru said - more often, more often!

  3. now we are talking. but make it beer.

  4. finally u got it rite:) best way to die....the happy way!

  5. make that a jalopeno vodka pilot! you'll burn well thru' and thru'

  6. Life fast die young and make a handsome corpse

  7. life fast die young and make a handsome corpse

  8. Dying doesn't make it any easier. We're running out of land for burial and we're running out of wood for cremation. Electric cremation doesn't work either with increasing power-cuts! Even the poor vultures who used to help out are dying off themselves.
    What a plight! Can't live and now you can't die either.
    But I'm all for chips, friends and vodka (but I prefer rum 'n coke, though). Paradise ... minus the nasty dying business.

  9. Well written Jane. You are Bang on again on the facts, but really, of the cells in your blood are running in positive spirits no amount of those external cancerous agents can even come close. So let chant..

  10. Let's look at that ad again - 'Isn't it time you renewed your Virgin cancer cover?'. So now you get cancer for being a virgin. Richard Branson's trying to tell us something.

  11. I will come as long as we have the roadside coffee in the open.. haha now don't know what all will be in it ;)

  12. I so agree with ya 100% why exist when you can LIVE

    1. and i agree with you 100% too. coincidence! ;)