Coinkidinky

Coincidence: Noun. When 2 unrelated things happen together. (2? Just 2?) Example:

8.28 am:  I was getting 1 kid’s medicine into his screaming face,

When the other one told me he’d got chewing gum in his school shoe
When S had taken off in my car since his own was in the service station
When the intercom rang to say the school bus was leaving
When the phone rang to tell me the new mattress had arrived

When the painters arrived to start doing the doors
When the tea boiled all over the stove, the tabletop and the floor
When the water ran out!!!
When the water tanker got a flat on the way in
When the locksmith landed up to fit a broken lock - right now or never
When the electricity decided to go off!!!
When the plumber admitted he had broken a pipe while trying to fix it
When I burnt 2 fingers trying to lift the bloody boiling tea off the bloody boiling stove
When my cook did not land up

When the dhobi landed up instead, wailing for instant payment
When my laptop slipped off a pile of magazines and landed on its head
When the gas freakin cylinder arrived after 2 weeks of pursuing them right THEN
When the dog decided to help  by chasing the painter off his ladder

When a client called to discuss a floppin’ pending job
And said, ‘But why can’t we discuss this now? You’re at home and free anyways, right?’

Should I read him the riot act, or read him the entire unedited definition of a coincidence (with expletives added for effect)?