Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Mom Exchange


I’m afraid I’m doing such a lousy job of being a mom, that my lil boys are soon going to smarten up and go demand a ‘cash back’ from the Mom Exchange.

I mean – examples:

Neel wasn’t allowed to enter his piano competition in school because his mom didn’t ask in writing. So I promptly sent a note – taking full blame. Blaming it on my PMS and my head trauma when I was 11 years old (oh well, not exactly , but...) and in short, saying – look, he’s got a lousy mom, just let the kid play, ok?

Lil Niks is the only boy in his class who hasn’t got an umbrella for his umbrella dance. Where can one buy an umbrella in the dry dustiest season of the year? I’ve combed the streets and stores. So he’s hopping around like Gene Kelly twirling the class Number Rod. Well, at least he’ll stand out on stage!

Neel has decided to take things into his own hands. Today, I see him breaking his plastic sphere into 2. What for? Cos he needed to take one of my bangles as a circular object to school for Timeclock drawing, and he assumed (correctly) I wouldn’t ever be able to find a bangle. So he created his own hemisphere instead.

Now, they’re gonna get chatting with their pals and realise the others have these wonderful moms who pack tiffins on time and have bangles and write notes for piano. And some day, they’re going to trot off to the Mom Exchange and demand they get one of those!

So if one day you meet my boys at the Mom Exchange, please tell them how I gave up a galloping career at its peak to wipe multi-coloured crap off baby buttocks. How I painted their room wall with the Jungle book animals they wanted, since Asian Paints couldn’t and how I got a dust allergy from it that I carry till today. How I make Stegosaurus idlis attacking Diplodoccus cauliflowers for dinner. How every time they go up on stage, I chew off all my fingernails. And every time I’m told what fine young men I’ve brought up, I begin to howl in pride. Bet they can’t get a mom from the Exchange who’ll do all that, huh?

36 comments:

  1. Yes, we bet the boys won't find a madder mum, or one they will be proud of. Back here after ages, Jandy, and see lots of sudden activity. I have too much catchung up now.

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  2. I read this and I wonder what the hell I am gonna do when my time comes !!
    I am more scared of failing my mom than i would be of my kids i guess !!

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    Replies
    1. As long as you remember, you'll never get it right, it's going to be ok, I guess, hehe!

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  3. All kids have this phase I guess. My mom mentions how I wished my grandmom was my mother :P But then my dad wished someone else was his...Its a circle :(

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  4. Jane, don't worry you will never be exchanged :) , your boy may not say it but they surely remember what you do :)

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    Replies
    1. wishful thinking, JB, wishful thinking!

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  5. P.S. I finally managed to get an umbrella for Niks that he broke on the FIRST day he took it to school!!!!

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  6. Jane, I'm not going to let my kids read this blog as they might want you in exchange ;).

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    Replies
    1. haha, that's the sweeeetest thing I've ever heard. Thank you.

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  7. aww Jane..I don't ever think the boys would want to exchange you for anyone else (however dismal the situation may seem)..and I guess all of us have wished at some point or the other that we had different set of parents, right? shows that no parent is perfect..parenting is simply overrated and these days there is undue pressure to get it all right *rolls eyes*.

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  8. Awww... that's the sweetest post. A mum who can make Stegosaurus idlis attacking Diplodoccus cauliflowers is the superest one ever.. at least my son would think so. You mind passing on those recipes? :-)

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    1. You have to be a really bad cook to disguise your cooking as dinosaurs :)

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  9. I only hope ur Neel reads this blog and knows how lucky he is...the idea of doing moon walking might not even strike him ..wonderful post :))

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    1. Thanks so much. I'm going to seek out this post and make them read it one day, methinks! :))))

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    1. Those kids will never exchange their super cool Mom trust me I can vouch for that. You as a mom I trust that I can hand over your god daughter to you now....

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    2. She's in way safer hands :)

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  12. Moms are one of a kind. theyre's no saying about a "good mom" and a "bad mom". theyre all different and soon your boys will realize that you only ever get one, and to always accept her for who she is and know that she does try her best.

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    Replies
    1. thanks Nick. notice you share the same name as one of my boys. :)

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  13. You are one of kind Jane! And I am sure both Neel and Niks will be saying 'my mom is bestest'!

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    Replies
    1. awww... you are too kind! (and i'm sure kylie's thinking the same!)

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    2. You're a GREAT mom. Your kids WILL be greatful one day!!!!

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  14. Aw that was the cutest read!

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    1. Thanks much. Your blog link isn't connecting.

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