Thursday, February 23, 2012

Booby Trap


There are tons of examples of women going gaga (or rather googoo gaga) after parenthood, while men, we are told, stay untouched – except for growing tummy bumps in empathy with their wives.
Ha!
Men are altered irrevocably by parenthood. See this:

Mother-to-be: Oh my gawd, I am turning obese. Everything on me is huge and ugly.

Father-to-be: (watching TV): No, no. You look good.

Mother-to-be: Tell me ONE way I look good now. I’m so huge!

Father-to-be: Your breasts look better now.

Mother-to-be: Can’t you think of anything else?

11 years later:

Mother: Do you realise how fast our little girl has grown?

Father: She’s not grown up at all. She’s still a kid.

Mother: She's not a kid. She’s growing breasts and all. It’s cute.

Father: She is NOT.

Mother: Not what?

Father: Not growing those... that...

Mother: Breasts? What – you can’t say breasts now? You never had a problem earlier with breasts.

Father: Don’t keep saying that word.

Mother: Oh, so what is she growing then?

Father: She is just getting a little better padded, that’s all.

Mother: Padded? Padded? Our daughter is growing up into a sofa?

Learning: As you can see, parenthood definitely alters fathers. It turns them into mothers.

16 comments:

  1. Thank you for supplying the guy's view, Jandi. Yes, girls should never grow up (unless they are someone else's girl's)

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  2. Great write J!!!!

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  3. This one is hilarious Jane. Briefly captured account of a funny kind of truth. And as is characteristic of you - witty, succinct and pointed.

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  4. thank you, sonal, seema, hathi... all replying from first-hand experience, i take it?

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  5. hi jane,

    i found ur latest blog ''udderly amusing'' but am unable to post my comment :(

    has something changed? do i need to sign in? when i write my comment and hit the send button or hit preview, it disappears. this happened when i tried to post a comment for ur last blog entry too.

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  6. SMS - that's because it's a booby-trap! read! ;) but actually - no idea why.

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  7. Still stuck in the booby-trap? write a post Jane...its been long :)
    love the sign off line of this post...absolutely looooove it. what an amazing learning :)
    As you can see, parenthood definitely alters fathers. It turns them into mothers.

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  8. This one Kich should respond to .. I would love to see what he says...

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  9. 0uch!!!! you hit a nerve with that jane...

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  10. @Pachydermus, I am noticing a new-found frugality with words... any particular reason?

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  11. I loved the last part Jane.....it was hilarious. Well, have to wait and see how things turn up this side in a few years :-)

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  12. yes, and as pretty as avantika is turning out - you'll have a lot to worry about!

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