Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Your turn to talk


Ok – so here’s the truth. Most of it. I stopped blogging because it seemed like a one-way mirror. Only a coupla comments - when Google would inform me there were over a 100 page views. Why does everyone just read but NOT talk back to me, I’d think? In fact, I started blogging to actually start bitching – y’know – share impolite ideas about dysfunctional things.

In real life, here are my conversational peaks:

Ma (reading newspaper): Do you know that not having breakfast causes duodenal ulcers?
Me: I’m not hungry so early in the morning.
Ma: It says here that 56% of people who do not eat breakfast live 3.2 years less than others.

Later, Me to Neel: Finish your food. You’ll get duodenal ulcers.
Niks: I too want them. It’s not fair. Neel gets everything!

Still later (9 pm) – Me to S, who’s surfing channels: I have to tell you something important.
S: No! How can they not be showing EPL?
Me: What’s wrong with you? I’m talking of something important.
S: What’s wrong with our cable operator? Let me call him.
Me: (At a volume rated 7.8 on the Richter scale)NO! Listen to ME! I want to have a conversation.
S (startled): Oh! What about?
Me: er...
S: Well?
Me: Do you know that not eating on time gives you duodenal ulcers?

And that’s why I blog. Hoping to have some more meaningful topics covered out here. And hoping YOU WILL REPLY !
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39 comments:

  1. Archana DoshiOctober 11, 2011 at 9:56 PM

    hahahahhahahahahah.
    Alright Jane, here is the thing. I believe As long as your life is going like a breeze and as long as you are breathing like a waves then even the ulsers wont affect you. So now you have something more to think. Do you think, you and your family have that life going like a breeze and your breath going like a easy wave? again, its is very perceptual, what is a breeze for you might be a twister for someone else, so evaluate for yourself and your family :). Gosh I hate to be on a serious not with you. :)

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  2. JandyOctober 11, 2011 at 10:01 PM

    @ archana - if my life's going like a breeze, it's going to be too calm to generate anything remotely interesting to blog about. so here's hoping for that twister then.

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  3. Puja UpadhyayOctober 11, 2011 at 11:33 PM

    I think we should meet up for breakfast one day :)
    Does having breakfast at 11 count?

    Did you also read 'Women who have a couple of small chocolate bars every week are 20% less prone to debilitating strokes than those who eat none'
    Saw this in the morning newspaper...just made my day.

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  4. AnonymousOctober 11, 2011 at 11:50 PM

    Starting today....a reply.Seriously,Jane,I have always wondered why people blog?isn't it a very intimate conversation with unknown people??Your blog is one i follow because it makes me smile .And then there is Suresh's blog which grounds me like nothing else!!Would love to know why you blog....
    Love ya,
    Leela

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  5. AnonymousOctober 11, 2011 at 11:52 PM

    Starting today....a reply.Seriously,Jane,I have always wondered why people blog?isn't it a very intimate conversation with unknown people??Your blog is one i follow because it makes me smile .And then there is Suresh's blog which grounds me like nothing else!!Would love to know why you blog....
    Love ya,
    Leela

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  6. deepaOctober 12, 2011 at 2:02 AM

    Can not working hard give anything ?

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  7. Hathi patani (the pea sized elephant)October 12, 2011 at 2:14 AM

    I know exactly where you are coming from Jandy with the need for meaningful conversations... Becoming a mother has taken me into a different sphere and has shaped and changed a lot of my ideas and perspectives, but being a full-time mom also has meant watching good conversations (other than with hubs) fade away - i am slowly coming to accept that this is a new phase in life which is giving me a chance to go within myself, to learn to trust my instincts and live life accordingly and this gives me the hope that it will open up far more interesting topics to discuss as time goes by - something way beyond the mundane. And if not, it will be fine too - i have ur blog to read ;) - oh yes, and to comment on too... hugs to you my dear

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  8. KKOctober 12, 2011 at 3:43 AM

    Jane - Your post stirred and shook me, so decided not to be a page view as usual. However, I wish you don't hold it against the strong and silent types like me (and S). We page views also in our own silent ways are letting you know we enjoy your blog posts. Keep posting.

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  9. AdiOctober 12, 2011 at 4:10 AM

    Haha. Niks. is. funny.

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  10. BinduOctober 12, 2011 at 4:13 AM

    Perhaps the same reason why i am such a irregular blogger...but you must not stop - i do swing by now and then and find your blogs funny and refreshing! Btw did I tell you I read your short story in Chicken Soup for Indian teachers...very well written! Congrats :)

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  11. JandyOctober 12, 2011 at 4:17 AM

    thanks, bindu. your blog url?

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  12. JandyOctober 12, 2011 at 4:18 AM

    @KK - haha, 'moved and stirred' you to which channel? (you've given me an idea - to change S's stage name to SandS) :)

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  13. JandyOctober 12, 2011 at 4:19 AM

    @puja - breakfast at 11 - and on chocolate? deal! ulcers can take a hike!

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  14. JandyOctober 12, 2011 at 4:35 AM

    @leela - i blog to remind myself that a lot of lousy things in life can be looked at in 2 ways. either be miserable about them. or be miserable about them, and then find how funny they really are. i think a sense of humour is the best thing i've been given, and the best thing i can pass on to my kids. is that an answer?

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  15. Hathi patani (the pea sized elephant)October 12, 2011 at 4:44 AM

    love your reason for blogging m'dear - don't stop - your special brand of humour makes us all smile :D

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  16. alokonthemoveOctober 12, 2011 at 4:46 AM

    the most useless people/things/news also happen for a reason. some useless journalist for some useless newspaper must have picked up some line from some useless research paper about the 'duodenal ulcers' which to me sounds like a name of a dinosaur, no wonder Nikko too wants it, caused this 'useless ulcer' in a 'going like a breeze' family.

    if not eating breakfast causes 'duodenal ulcers' then I should be having some 100s of dinosaurs in my private collection :-)

    BUT, yes, lack of meaningful conversation does causes all kinds of ulcers. Jane, we need to have a long conversation when I see you here :-)

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  17. JandyOctober 12, 2011 at 4:46 AM

    thanks, hathi patani. and i'm hoping our conversations, outside this blog (and the ones not involving Arsenal) are meaningful too?

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  18. Hathi patani (the pea sized elephant)October 12, 2011 at 4:47 AM

    he he of course they are - do you even need to ask??

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  19. JandyOctober 12, 2011 at 4:54 AM

    @alok - i'm so looking forward to that long ulcer-busting talk then, in goa.

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  20. IraOctober 12, 2011 at 4:56 AM

    Your family is your inspiration and give them a big hug so that more of the blog comes along I love them all..

    A conversation I had last night.... Hubby: will you have a drink

    Me: Are you having

    Hubby: Tell me you want or not

    Me: You having one

    Hubby: What has that got to do with you having a drink

    Me: Tell me if you having a drink

    Hubby: Why can't you just just always just answer YES OR NO

    Me: Well how else would we have this long conversation!!!!!!!

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  21. JandyOctober 12, 2011 at 5:00 AM

    hahahahaha, ira. that was priceless!

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  22. seema singhOctober 12, 2011 at 5:04 AM

    I keep telling everyone at home that I may soon need to go to Columbia Asia for speech therapy!! Why don't people talk a little more than uh & ah??Jane t'was a pleasure once again reading this & as always......am grinning!!

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  23. Lalita KambhampatiOctober 12, 2011 at 5:06 AM

    Thanks so much for your comeback to the blogarena. Besides your sense of humor, your blog gives a keyhole peep into the life of a very sweet, sensitive and dear friend and a trailer view of her thoughts and emotions. Hoping that you will continue sharing your life with us thru your blog:) And I promise to write some boring comments for you;)

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  24. AnonymousOctober 12, 2011 at 5:27 AM

    too funny , always makes me grin ....and its so true , sometimes we want to say things but they lose all their flavour if they're not timed well.... what duodenal ulcers he's say , what on earth are you talking about ??? and yes after meeting them , i can very well imagine Niks demanding his share of whatever that's going around !!!! hilarious ...

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  25. JandyOctober 12, 2011 at 5:30 AM

    @lalita kambhapati - thanks. and remember - you asked for more!

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  26. JandyOctober 12, 2011 at 5:32 AM

    @anonymous - thanks.

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  27. Sashi ImchenOctober 13, 2011 at 12:18 AM

    janey.... decided to quickly sneak a peak ... am at school! and I have decided I'l come here whenever I need to get some 'upliftment'!!! Grin...

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  28. JandyOctober 13, 2011 at 3:42 AM

    Sash, not sure how cool it is to distract a School Principal :P

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  29. keyamomOctober 13, 2011 at 2:14 PM

    Your sense of humour is a gift and your way with words is incredible! So don't stop! Never, ever, ever!

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  30. Aarohi SinghOctober 13, 2011 at 10:57 PM

    Jane... it's sooooo good to have you back. I absolutely love to go through your blog. And when Alok and you have that looong conversation- include me too. I miss you guys. Alok- you listening?

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  31. JandyOctober 13, 2011 at 11:06 PM

    @keyamom - thanks. blush.

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  32. JandyOctober 13, 2011 at 11:07 PM

    thank you, aarohi. dec in goa - for that talkathon! (the mountain needs to go to Muhammad).

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  33. vinooOctober 16, 2011 at 9:31 AM

    What is duodenum? Now tell me more about duodenal ulcer.

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  34. JandyOctober 23, 2011 at 7:11 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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  35. JandyOctober 23, 2011 at 7:13 AM

    haha vinoo. no, with me it's meaningful conversation only. for the complete guide on duodenal ulcers - come and meet me Ma

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  36. smsNovember 14, 2011 at 6:46 AM

    I do not revisit blogs but yours I do :)
    so do justice to the 'pen is mightier than the sword' that too a humorous pen :-D
    keep blogging jg and you will spread cheer :)

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  37. JandyNovember 14, 2011 at 8:30 PM

    thank you. honoured.

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  38. ShaliniNovember 29, 2011 at 10:31 AM

    I loved the part where Niks WANTED whatever Neil was having, ulcers et al! Really Jane, you are something else...I enjoyed reading this one!

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  39. JandyNovember 29, 2011 at 8:12 PM

    Shalini - thanks. and you'll soon get around to the time when you have to divide everything (including ulcers) into 2. :)

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